Haunted HiJinks!
by Quill of Molliemon
Summary: One-shot, falls between part 1 and 2 of "Gone Fishin'". Kushina wants to visit a haunted house. Minato would rather not. And what's gotten into all the appliances? Read, review, and enjoy! Happy Halloween!


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto. I do not own Pokémon. I make no money by writing this. So do not sue…

**Timeline:** This falls between "Fish Tail 1" and Fish Tail 2" of _Gone Fishin'_—Minato (12) and Kushina (12) have been traveling together for approximately ten months.

Minato—Ivysaur, Ponyta, Pikachu, Poliwag, Murkrow

Kushina—Croconaw, Gyarados, Kabuto, Chinchou

**Other Notes: **(Crossover, could be a crack!fic if you want) Here there be Naruto characters and Pokémon monsters! This is a _one-shot_ so please read and enjoy!

* * *

**Haunted Hi-Jinks!**

_A Halloween Special!_

"Where are we going again?" Minato muttered as Kushina mercilessly dragged him along behind her.

"To this really cool place I heard about in town," the tomboy replied, not slowing her pace a bit.

"And what is this 'really cool place'?" the blond boy growled in annoyance as a branch smacked him in the head.

"You'll see when we get there!" the red-haired girl cackled.

Minato glared at her back.

Wanting to see as much of the world as possible, Minato had decided to visit some of the minor countries while taking a bit of time off gym challenges. He'd come to Forest Country to see the trees which rivaled those in the legendary Forest of Death in size and age. And then there was the plethora of grass, bug, and flying-type pokémon as well as various other species of forest-dwelling pokémon that called the region home.

But Kushina had apparently overheard something in Tree Town—a fascinating place that was half in the trees—that overruled whatever plans he had for a nice, peaceful hike out in the wilds.

_Oh I wish I could ditch her!_ he fumed. _All I wanted was a nice camping trip, but no! She's got to go chasing some random rumor…_

It was getting late, and with the dense trees it was getting darker even faster. Soon the more nocturnally active kinds of pokémon like ghost and dark-types would be out and about. Minato might've looked forward to the natural transition if he wasn't so busy being dragged headlong who-knows-where into the forest.

"Are we there yet?" Minato groaned after stubbing his toe on a tree root.

"I'm sure we're almost there," Kushina replied. "This is definitely the trail that that old man told me about!"

"If we end up lost in the middle of nowhere, it's totally your fault," Minato grumbled.

"We won't get lost," the tomboy declared confidently. "Lighten up!"

"No," Minato said. "Someone has to be sensible and responsible, and since you definitely aren't either of those things it has to be me."

"Pfft!" she scoffed. "Oh come on! Relax! What's the worst that could happen?"

"Don't say stuff like that!" he snapped, and then crashed into her back. "What?!"

"We're here…"

Peering around her stopped body, the first thing that Minato saw in the dim light was a pair of ornate wrought-iron gates that were rusted, vine-choked, and crooked on their hinges. Beyond them were the overgrown remains of what had once been a well-manicured lawn and finely-trimmed hedges and ornamental trees. And beyond that he could make out what looked like a broken-down, abandoned building of some kind.

"…Wow," he muttered very unenthusiastically. "An abandoned building. Great."

"It's a haunted house!" Kushina informed him and grabbed his wrist again. "Come on, let's go!"

"What?!" Minato sputtered, digging in his heels. "You want to go into a house that's infested with ghost pokémon?! Why?"

"Because it'll be an adventure!" she replied as if he was some kind of idiot. "…You're not scared of ghosts, are you?"

"No," he frowned. "I just don't think we should go looking for trouble. Ghost pokémon can be dangerous, and they only get more dangerous in large groups."

"Oh don't be such a baby!" the tomboy snorted. "We'll be okay; we've got our own pokémon to protect us if anything happens."

"It's still a bad idea," Minato insisted. "Let's go back, or somewhere else."

Kushina gave him an annoyed look before dropping his wrist and marching towards the overgrown house. "Do what you want, you wuss. I'm going in there, with or without you!"

"Fine!" Minato yelled at her retreating back. "Do what you want! That's what you always do anyway! See if I care!"

She waved her arm over her head in what was probably a very rude gesture, but he didn't pay it any attention. Instead, Minato spun on his heel and marched back the way that he'd come. She'd made up her mind and now she had to deal with the consequences.

But as he picked his way back to the more-traveled trails, he felt no relief that he'd finally managed to ditch the pesky tomboy…

* * *

Kushina Uzumaki thought dark thoughts as she stormed through the crumbling building. In its heyday it had probably been a beautiful mansion with fine carpets, fine art pieces, crystal chandeliers, and whatever else screamed big money. It was all gone or ruined now—the walls were rotten and bare of paintings, the carpets black and mildewy, the chandeliers were smudged and coated in cobwebs, and the air was dusty and musty and dead.

She really didn't pay too much attention to the setting, though. Her mind was too busy fuming. She was too pissed to really enjoy the adventure.

_He wants to go to backwater Forest Country? Fine, I can work with that. I find something fun for us to do—an adventure!—and what does he do? He whines like a big scaredy-cat! Ugh…_

It was a sad day indeed when a girl had no qualms about marching into a haunted house while a boy wanted nothing to do with it. Shaking her head fiercely, the tomboy marched deeper and deeper into the abandoned house. She would face whatever the house had for her, and face it alone.

_…Heh, when I first met him I called him a girl, and now he's acting like one. And he thought I was a boy, and I'm acting like one. He's the sissy, and I'm the brave one. How funny. I'll never let him live this down._

Her flashlight chose this moment to flicker and fail, leaving her in almost perfect darkness.

"Damn it!" she cursed. "Stupid thing…"

Kushina glared at the metal tube, before grinning when an idea struck her.

"Hikari!" she cried cheerfully as she released her fishy chinchou from her pokéball. "Use _flash_ so I see what I'm doing!"

There was a blinding strobe flash and then the light settled into a nice glow. Satisfied, she gathered the blue roundish fish into her arms and continued her explorations. Her grin turned smug.

"Heh, good thing I borrowed that HM from Sunshine's bag when he was sleeping that one time," she snickered. "Otherwise I'd really be in trouble without a flashlight!"

_Flash_ was a funny thing. Some countries considered it important enough for it to be distributed to trainers in "Hidden Machines" while others sold it as one-use-only "Technical Machines". Just before reaching Forest Country, Namikaze had stumbled into a pawn shop and found a used _flash_ HM offered for real cheap. It was a great investment.

"…I wonder why this place was abandoned," she mumbled thoughtfully. "That old man never said."

The floor creaked under her shoes as she walked. The light from Hikari's antenna-like lures cast odd shadows when she passed things like half-rotted drapes or broken bits of furniture. It was all super creepy, but she wasn't really scared.

Her older brothers had told her ghost stories all the time to try and scare her, but she only found them suspenseful and exciting. She loved watching ghost movies, too; it was fun to try and guess when the monster would appear. The gore and more graphic bits she could do without, and clowns she didn't care for, but ghosts and thriller movies were pretty cool.

_I wonder where all the ghost pokémon are,_ she thought as she wandered the large dining room with its long table. _That old man made it sound like there were tons living here. Maybe…they left for the night? They're nocturnal so they wouldn't need to hide in here from the sunlight anymore._

At the end of the dining room, Kushina found her way into the kitchen. It was as rundown and dusty as the rest of the mansion, but…some of the appliances looked to be in much better condition. The girl frowned at the refrigerator, which was a gaudy red-orange.

"…What an ugly fridge."

There was an electrical crackle and an eerie purple glow surrounded the boxy fridge. A spike rose at the top of the fridge…and then two large eyes opened and stared at her. The fridge wobbled and then lurched towards her with a smile.

"Kyaa!" Kushina yelped and stumbled as she turned to flee, nearly dropping Hikari. "What sort of fridge has eyes?!"

* * *

Minato stood at the edge of the main trail and stared in the direction of Tree Town. He could follow the trail and get to the pokémon center there in about an hour. But if he did that, he would be leaving Kushina out in the forest all alone.

_…Who cares? It's what she wanted. She's a pokémon trainer; she can take care of herself just fine._

But still, he hesitated.

_If…if Uncle ever found out that I left a girl behind at a haunted house…_ He made a face. _…I don't think he'd ever stop making fun of me for being too cowardly to escort her. And she'll never let me forget it either, I'm sure._

With how doggedly she'd followed him around so far, he was sure that she'd catch up to him or find him again sooner or later.

…_Damn it!_ Clenching his fists, he turned around and headed back to the abandoned mansion. _Stupid girl…_

* * *

Gasping for breath, Kushina leaned back against the wall with Hikari still in her arms. The fridge had chased her out of the kitchen and down the hall where it had opened its doors to blast her with frigid air and snow. She'd lost it by running down into the basement. Hefty refrigerators couldn't get down stairs without falling and breaking she figured.

"…The laundry room?" she muttered, catching sight of some laundry hampers, a washer, and a dryer. The appliances were the same garish red-orange color as the fridge. "Man, who bought the appliances for this place? They had sucky taste."

There was a crackle…and then the washing machine was surrounded by a dark blue glow and got the same face as the refrigerator had.

"W-what?!"

The washer disconnected from the wall and its water hose swung around to spray an impressive gush of water at her.

"Aw, damn it!" she wailed and started running to avoid getting blasted. "Not again! What the hell is wrong with this house?!"

* * *

A full moon shone through the tree tops when Minato reached the front gates to the mansion again. With a sigh, he trudged down the weedy gravel path towards the tall double-front doors. She would certainly give him a hard time when he found her, but it would surely be worse if he waited for her to find him back in town or elsewhere out in the forest.

The front door looked heavy, but he found it easy to push open and step inside.

"Kushina?" he called into the darkness.

There was no answer, not even an echo.

Minato sighed again and headed into the building with his flashlight pointing the way. It was an unpleasant place, although ghost pokémon probably enjoyed it. He wondered why Kushina had been so excited about coming to such a dump.

_Does she feel like she has something to prove?_ he wondered. _Or…could she want to capture a ghost? I don't think there are any part water-type ghost pokémon…_

Just as he was starting his search of the ground floor, his flashlight flickered and died.

_Weird…_ He shook the metal device and pressed the button a few times to no effect. _I thought I just changed the batteries… Oh well._

Selecting one of the pokéballs from his collection he opened it to release the yellow mouse inside.

"Kiroi, use _flash_ so that we can see, please."

The pikachu eagerly obliged him and within seconds there was a nice circle of illumination around them.

"Alright," he smiled. "Now let's go find Kushina and see what she's up to."

Kiroi liked this idea and had trouble not racing ahead to find the red-headed girl.

Most rooms that they visited were empty, or had furniture covered by ratty gray sheets. But when they peeked into the game room, everything was uncovered like a pool game was about to get underway. And sitting on the uncovered table was…

"…A microwave?" Minato muttered, absolutely baffled by its presence. He slowly approached the red-orange device and tentatively poked it. "What a weird color."

Just as Kiroi hopped up on the table to join him in poking the appliance, there was a crackling electrical sound and a red sparking aura surrounded the device. A spike popped up on top of the squarish machine. And then…a face appeared on it.

Minato gaped at it. "What the…"

The microwave door swung open with a "ding" sound and flames and intense heat spilled out at him.

"Whoa!" he yelped and grabbed Kiroi and fled the room.

_What the heck was that about?!_ Minato wondered as he raced down the hall, away from the lingering heat of the microwave. _Is that…some sort of pokémon?!_

When he felt certain that he was safe, he leaned against a table with a plug-in fan sitting on it to try and re-gather his nerves from the shock.

"That was a close one," he panted, putting Kiroi on his shoulder. "I wonder…"

He reached into his pocket for his pokédex, but stopped when he felt a breeze on the back of his neck. Frowning, he turned—

The fan was now hovering in the air, surrounded by a yellow aura, with that same face staring at him from it.

"Huh?!"

The animated fan almost seemed to laugh at him and then let out a concentrated blast of wind that shredded some nearby drapes.

"Wah!" he yelped and took off running again as the fan flew after him in pursuit.

What followed felt like some bizarre dream. No matter where he ran in the mansion, there seemed to be an appliance ready to come to life and attack and chase him. In addition to the microwave and fan, there was a washing machine and a refrigerator.

At one point, when he was being pursued by the fan, he had Kiroi strike it with a _thunderbolt_. That stopped the fan, but a white lightning bolt exploded from it, pinballed around the hall almost too quickly to follow, and then hit the microwave and the chase was on again. There seemed to be no way to win or escape.

His pokédex was no help either. Whenever he tried to take a reading on the living electronics, he got nothing but a staticy screen. It worked just fine when he checked it by looking up the pikachu entry by scanning Kiroi, so he wasn't sure what was wrong.

_Is it not a pokémon?_ he pondered during one of the brief respites from the chase. _Or is something else going on? Electronic interference maybe…?_

Chewing his lip, he scanned up and down a hallway before turning the corner and creeping down it.

_Maybe I should just get out of here. I bet Kushina's already left after running into…whatever those things are. If she was still here I think I would've stumbled over her by now…_

Senses alert for the appearance of another aggressive electronic device, Minato tip-toed down the hall and passed an open closet door—

A hand reached out of the black closet, grabbed him by the jacket sleeve, and yanked him and Kiroi inside, slamming the door once they were inside and trapping them.

"Wha—"

"Shh!"

Minato blinked and found himself in a very dusty broom closet, staring at Kushina and her chinchou.

"Oh, I was looking for you," he said.

She stared at him for a long minute. "…I see you've met my friends: the microwave, the refrigerator, the washing machine, and the fan."

"Yeah," he sighed and rubbed the back of his head. He stopped and frowned when he noticed what her electric fish was doing. "Is Hikari using _flash_?"

"Yep," she nodded. "It's a good thing that I taught her that move. My flashlight stopped working."

"…Did you take the HM out of my bag?" he asked slowly.

"I put it right back," she replied.

He glared at her. "You could've just asked me if you could use it."

"You were asleep when I thought of it and I didn't want to wake you up," she shrugged.

"Then you should've waited until morning!" he scowled.

"I would've forgotten by then," she protested. "What's the big deal, anyway? It's an HM; it wasn't like I was going to use it up."

"You still should've asked me first!" he hissed. "It's the polite thing to do, you know."

"Sure, sure," she grumbled. "If you get your hands on another shiny HM that I'd like to borrow, I'll ask you first."

He eyed her suspiciously. "I'm not sure if I should believe you."

"Are you calling me a liar!" she snapped, jumping to her feet.

Kiroi and Hikari squirmed, upset that their trainers were butting heads…again.

"No," he replied. "I'm just not sure that you'll remember for next time."

"Why you—"

The possessed fan found them then, and blew the broom closet door open.

"Damn it!" the girl swore, bracing herself against the stiff wind. "Hikari, _bubble beam_!"

The electric fish sprayed a high-powered stream of bubbles against the wind and blasted the floating fan into the far wall of the hallway where it sank to the floor and the white lightning exploded from it, vanishing around a corner.

"Take that!" Kushina growled, scooping up her fish.

Minato put Kiroi back on his shoulder and grabbed the girl's wrist. "Let's get out of here."

Without waiting for her to reply, he dragged her off towards the exit. Their escape seemed clean. No other appliances appeared to interrupt their flight.

When they reached the front lawn he stopped to catch his breath and she pulled her hand free and smacked his shoulder.

"Hey!" he snapped. "What was that for?!"

"Don't pull me!" she growled.

"You do it to me all the time!" he shot back.

"No, not all the time!" she protested.

"Yes you—"

There was the sound of a motor turning on, and then another red-orange device came around a corner of the mansion, driving straight at them while surrounded by an eerie green glow and wearing that same face as all the other machines.

"A lawn mower?!" Minato choked.

"Of course," Kushina groaned. "Head for the gates!"

The two of them sprinted all the way back to the rusted iron gates and ran several yards beyond them for good measure. They didn't stop until the gates were out of sight and they couldn't hear the lawn mower any more. Still wary of pursuit, they stared behind them almost expecting something else to appear and harass them.

"…That was not what I expected to find at all," the girl scowled.

"What did you expect to find?" the blond boy panted.

"Ghost pokémon," she answered. "I always wanted to see one in person."

"Maybe…a ghost pokémon possessed those appliances?" Minato suggested.

"Did you see any ghost pokémon?" Kushina snorted. "There was only that weird light. No gastly, no shuppets, no misdreavus, no duskulls, no ghost pokémon, just that damn white lightning." She made a face. "I think when that old man said the place was haunted, he meant it was haunted by a real, non-pokémon ghost…"

Minato nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess…"

"What a bust," the red-head pouted, petting her chinchou's head. "Oh well. Let's go find something else to do!"

The boy sighed and followed her. As they walked, he pulled out his flashlight to check it again. When he tested the switch, it turned on as if nothing was wrong.

_Whoa, weird…_

* * *

With the two humans and their pokémon gone, the possessed lawn mower returned to the tool shed and a flash of white light abandoned it to ricochet to the highest point of the mansion's roof. There the light solidified into a small orange creature, barely more than a round head with a spike on it, which was surrounded with pale blue electricity. Two lightning bold shapes extended off its body, looking almost like arms.

_:They left so soon?:_ the rotom whined. _:Aww… And I was just really getting into it!:_

Snapping its pointed teeth in annoyance, the electric ghost briefly transformed into light again to travel through the mansion's wiring and into the only television there was. It was lonely without humans to play with, but there was always TV. And what better way to watch than to be inside the screen?


End file.
